All the education, the advanced degrees, the academic awards, all my accomplishments, the private club, the pilates, the dermabrasion, the subtle nips and tucks, and I’m still just Paris Geller. The amazing, insignificant, invisible girl.
If you spent your last weekend of November like I did, you likely crawled up in a cozy ball to binge-watch the Gilmore Girls revival on Netflix. [Spoilers? Only minor ones ahead.]
The above quote from the revival hit me as a glaring reminder that even after all these years, the character I’ll always identify with most on Gilmore Girls is Paris Geller. I have been and always will be an overachieving control freak like Paris. As I got older, I learned to embrace those once self-destructive traits, and simmer them down by using them to my advantage. I realized that those behaviours were the reasons why I always had a strong sense of who I was, where I was going, what I wanted to do, and how to top myself every time.
I’m a highly competitive person, but I’m only really ever competitive with myself. I’m a perfectionist, but that comes in handy when I’m writing/editing/designing for work (OK, and fun). I like to delete the superfluous, whether that means physical clutter, unnecessary negative thoughts, or the possibility of wasted time and energy.
But also like Paris, I do have one weakness: social relationships. I suffer from social anxiety, which has been heightened over the last few years. But I’ve been lucky to be assured that it is totally OK to not always know what to say — if I want to say anything at all — and take a step back to just fade into the background. At the end of the day, I find personal solace in knowing once I am comfortable with the people around me, I share warmth and empathy whenever I can.
I’m also still learning to take the bad with the good in my relationships (so long as it’s not a toxic one). Remember all those times Paris threw Doyle out whenever he said the wrong thing? Or how, more recently, even after everything she’s accomplished, she still melted into a puddle at the sight of Tristan? Yup, it me. And I’m still learning to accept that it’s OK to lose a little bit of yourself to enjoy some wonderful moments in life. Whether in romantic, platonic, or familial relationships, I do think I’ve made some huge strides there!
So the quote above from the Gilmore Girls revival was a nice reminder of how far Paris Geller and I have come. I like to think we’d get along in real life. She’d know I’d support her through everything because I know where she’s coming from, and I’d know she’d light a fire under my ass to take part in some (scheduled) spontaneity.
Are you also a Gilmore Girls fan? If so, let me know which character you relate to the most in the comments section below. I’m soooo curious to get to know all you Rory, Lorelai, and even Michel types!
P.S. You can’t write about Paris Geller without giving major props to actress Liza Weil. Bravo to her perfect portrayal of the eternally driven and perpetually nervous Paris throughout the years. She made her absolutely insufferable and undeniably likeable at the same time.
(Photo credit: Netflix)